calling your baby ugly

when you've been on your own a while, hard graft setting everything up from scratch, getting somebody new in the team is theoretically a moment to rejoice in reduced workload, shared responsibility and someone to bounce ideas off. but hold on, brace yourself it begins with more work, first there is the preparation, new people need a desk, a laptop, they need a phone a number, they don't know where the stationery lives, you need to show them around and introduce them to other people, some of whom you've forgotten their name, let alone what contribution they make to the company where you work. 

then they ask questions, all sorts of questions why do you do this, whats the history behind this, all enthusiastic and eager to please. just when you think you can enjoy a quiet sandwich at your desk they turn up with their note book. remember that great idea you had last year, the one everyone talked about, and your head office really loved, well apparently its shit and they do something far better, more shiny and wow in the real world where newly comes from.

they come with ideas you secretly wish you had, or you have had but couldn't be arsed to do as it seems too much like hard work, your colleagues suddenly view you with a sceptical eye, why did they think you were so great, maybe they never did.

so prepare yourself getting someone new in the team isn't about getting home earlier and getting a better work-life balance, its about someone younger, thinner, better hair but worse music taste with a brighter bigger future calling your baby ugly.